Phil in the corps
by Col. Strackmann aka Jim
Summary: Taking place in the Lwts universe. Phil runs away and joins the marine corps and also some crazy adventures. My first story, please R&R
1. Chapter 1

**Hey Arnold belongs to Craig Barrett and Nickeloden. The Shortman kids belong to Suprsingr. Joe Ono and the Ono family belong to me. Sarah Benette belongs to writergirl97. Bella Bennette belongs to starrynights1987. Alice Martin nee Barker belongs to AlbasterTemptress.**

Out of all the Shortman kids, Philip was defiantly the craziest. Even from a young age he could completely flip his lid when something upset him. High school was no exception. Hormones were catching up to him and were putting him on edge. One vital peace of information that his family and his school was that absolutely hated girls, thought they were evil witches out to control the male race. A most ironic belief Phil had since he was since he was into girly things, his best friend is a girl, his favorite cousin is a girl and he has had three girlfriends.

Girlfriend number one Sarah Bennette broke up with him after a misunderstanding with her sister Bella.

Girlfriend number two Alice Martin nee. Barker broke up with him because to put it bluntly, they were too damn crazy for each other.

Girlfriend number three Sarina or Sara as she was commonly named broke up with him halfway through senior year and was Phil's longest relationship. They got together in the fifth grade after an awkward friendship. They broke up in the sixth and tenth grade when he went out with Sarah and Alice. They gotten back together each time but a quarter ways into senior year they broke up again, something over dinner, but it wasn't important to Phil. After the third breakup Phil was more isolated than ever. Whatever Arnold, Helga and Dr. Bliss did to try to make him talk about it was just met with an angry rant or rebuttal. Phil was at the bottom of another depression well.

One day a decision Phil made was going to change his life. Instead of his science teacher teaching science one day, He decided to take his class to a college fair. Phil's dream is to become an actor, director and writer so he was taking pamphlets from all the acting and writing colleges. Then the marine recruiting said to him "Hey you interested in joining the Corps"

"Oh no" Phil said in an angry tone "I'm not joining your stupid Corps, I'm going to be a famous actor, writer and director, I'm not going to waste time and become some stupid musclebound trigger-happy doufus."

"Ok" said the recruiter in a calm voice "So the marines are not for you, I understand." "But" the recruiter said in his calm voice "If you get interested, take a couple of pamphlets"

Phil went over and looked at some of them in curiously. After he turned to the recruiter and "you know what, I might take up your offer."

Meanwhile Phil looked at some of the Marine pamphlets and was thinking to himself '_Philip Shortman this is the craziest thing you have ever done'_ While signing his name and information on the recruit information. The rest of the day Phil was thinking about how to break the news to his parents.

The Shortman family dinner has calmed down ever since Zack and Josh aka Ham moved away. Also thanks to therapy and his brothers being gone Phil has calmed down but he still didn't think highly of the female race and still hated being touched. But the Shortman dinner abnormally returned with Phil on edge about the news.

Finally Arnold spoke up "something the matter Phil, you've been tense all evening"

"He was tense yesterday, he's tense today, he'll be tense tense tomorrow football head" Helga said nonchalantly. "I mean don't you know our-"

"Actually" Phil said nervously "I have a big announcement"

"OMG what is it Phil" Amanda chirped up "you and Sara-"

"NO, not like that" Phil said "I mean." "Then what is this big announcement?" Helga said waiting for her son's response.

"I joined the Marine Corps" Phil said with a nervous voice.

When he said that the whole dinner table was in shock. Helga was nervously chocking up food, Amanda's face turned to shock as did Arnold's. After chocking Helga nervously said "what did our son say?"

Phil spoke up "I said I joined the Marines Mom." If there was a double spit-take everyone at dinner would have done it. Helga once again spoke up and said "Now Phil, I don't want to get in the way of your plans but the Marines aren't suited-"she said nervously smiling and rubbing her right arm with her left "to your…well….character." Arnold spoke up "now now I think we should let our son make his own decisions" he said calmly. "But Arnold" Helga said on edge "you know how 'special' Phil is" using air quotes.

"You know what" Arnold said stressed out "let's talk about this after dinner.

After dinner Arnold, Helga and Phil gathered in the living room to talk about Phil's decision. "But Phil" Helga said "you know how you get in these kinds of situations." "I know mom but it's my decision" Phil shot back angrily. Arnold asked curiously "why do you want to join the marines Phil?" Phil spoke up nervously "well my science teacher took me to a college fair today, there was a marine recruiter, at first I blew him off but then he gave me a couple of pamphlets and I got curious." "So you signed up" Arnold said. "Yup" Phil said. Then Phil said "look I'll serve two years then go to college, I promise, okay." Then Arnold said smiling "okay."

A few months later Arnold, Helga, Amanda and Phil were at the airport departure counter saying their goodbyes. Arnold hugging said "don't forget to write us." Amanda hugging said "good luck as a solider marine guy." Helga having a hard time letting go said crying "don't forget to write and call and when I can send you things I'm goinna send-." Finally Arnold said "enough Helga he'll send us when he'll send us" while prying Helga outta her hug. Finally they all waved goodbye while Phil boarded the airplane.

Finally it dawned on Phil what he gotten into. '_Oh dear lord what have I gotten into' _Phil thought. What he didn't know was that he was going to meet an equally nutty best friend.


	2. Chapter 2

In Oklahoma City, a young Joseph Yuki Ono was straddling with anxiety. He had just signed up for the biggest undertaking of his life, The US Marine Corps. In a few months after his graduation from Putman City north high school he would be heading to MCRD San Diego. After being accepted his anxiety shot up to high heaven. There was another reason, Joe Ono is autistic.

Joe Ono had autism, Asperger's syndrome to be precise and even though therapy over his childhood years had helped him remain calm, interact with people and adapt to change he still felt nervous leaving home. His dad and middle namesake Yuki Ono helped ease the pressure by reminding him of his family's boot camp experiences.

This was the first reason Joe enlisted. Joe was born into a very military family. His mother and father were in the Oklahoma Army National Guard. His mother, Ellen Maria Murphy-Ono is commander of the 45th Fires Brigade and his father is commander of the 45th Infantry Brigade Combat Team. His older brother Jack, who is six years older than him, is in UA Little Rock training to be an army doctor. His older sister Mary Lou, who is five years older than him, is a paratroop platoon commander in the 82nd Airborne Division. His older brother, who is three older than him, James or Jim as he is commonly called is in NROTC at the University of Texas. Meanwhile Jim's twin sister Billie Sue chose the enlisted path and became an enlisted airwoman in the Marine Corps. His older brother Cecil, who is two year older than Joe, is in UT Martin ROTC.

A second reason Joe enlisted is because Joe is a military fanatic. He originally wanted to be a Construction Worker or truck driver starting at age ten he started studying military history. He would talk to his parents and their friends, Afghan war veterans about their experiences. By age twelve he wanted to be in the Military, specifically the Marines. His parents rather than stop him and suggest alternatives, helped him in his goals. Yuki took him shooting and signed him up for the Civil Air Patrol. Both Cecil and Yuki helped build up his body for boot camp.

At PC North's auditorium there were cheers but Yuki was still nervous. He was going to leave tomorrow. When meeting with his parents Joe started to say in a nervous tone "Dad….I'm still nervous." Yuki was the first to pipe up "Is it about boot camp because we discussed this, we know your nervous, me, your mother and your siblings were nervous too" while putting his arm around his son's shoulder. Joe brushed it off. He didn't like to be touched that much. That's when his mother said "and we also discussed before if it doesn't work out, you can go to college and come back." Then Yuki said with a smile "come on son, I promised you dinner at Fridays tonight, and your grandparents and brothers and sisters will be there." After an awkward Fridays dinner with his family, Joe heeded into a nervous sleep.

At the airport security line in the morning, Joe said his final goodbyes to his family. "Remember son to listen to your DI's" Yuki said with a smile. "And remember to write us often" said his mom Ellie. "I will guys" said Joe with a smile. They exchanged one final hug that Ellie had hard time letting go of. "I'm sorry" Ellie said with a pinch of sadness "It's just hard seeing my boy grow up." With that Joe got in line and boarded the plane. The airplane took off and Joe was still nervous out of his mind. This was a big undertaking, and what he didn't realize was that he was about to do it with another very eccentric person.


End file.
